Prayer Journals - How I Got Started
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Tears. Uncontrollable tears. And I had no idea why.
I just sat there. In the wake of a deeply powerful sermon from Ecclesiastes, all I could do was sit, not move or hold in my emotions. I felt a deep sense of despair verging on an existential crisis that eventually resulted in a whole new way of understanding family, work, and being a husband. This little crack in the dam of my emotions was the beginning of a twenty year journey in knowing the voice of God.
A fellow pastor at this retreat came over to sit with me. As she put her hand on my shoulder, the tears started flowing. She said very little. I really didn’t want to speak but her presence meant the world to me. To this day I still hold a deep sense of appreciation for her silent presence.
As I left the chapel, I felt compelled to go sit alone on the retreat grounds. I had my journal with me because I was using it to take notes at the retreat. Journaling at this point in my life was very sporadic.
As I sat in the chapel I had an idea, I felt like God was calling me to “journal His voice.” I was so self conscious: could I really expect God to speak to me through my own writing? Despite feeling very foolish, I asked God to speak to my heart. I opened my journal and decided to write whatever came to mind. I had done stream of consciousness journaling in high school but never with a prayer asking to hear the Father’s voice.
Here’s what I heard, “Tom I love you. I’ve always loved you. Not because of what you do or because of what you’ve done; I simply love you. You are going to face some hard times. Know that I am with you.” Simple; yes. Profound; not really. Deeply personal and healing. For sure. I then spent the next thirty minutes writing out a conversation with God. I would write my thoughts and then journal what I supposed would be His voice. Those thirty minutes were good, I got my feelings on paper, but those first couple of sentences were different: they felt like the voice of God.
Since that night, I’ve used journaling as a way to listen for God’s voice. Writing helps me to slow down and to hear God’s words more distinctly. At times, I’ll hear God speak as I ask Him questions about a certain scripture passage. At other times, I’ll hear his voice in my questions and His answers. Often I sit quietly and wait. When I sense the voice of God moving, I simply write what I hear.
When I slow down and listen, God speaks.
© 2023, Tom Stephen
Tears. Uncontrollable tears. And I had no idea why.
I just sat there. In the wake of a deeply powerful sermon from Ecclesiastes, all I could do was sit, not move or hold in my emotions. I felt a deep sense of despair verging on an existential crisis that eventually resulted in a whole new way of understanding family, work, and being a husband. This little crack in the dam of my emotions was the beginning of a twenty year journey in knowing the voice of God.
A fellow pastor at this retreat came over to sit with me. As she put her hand on my shoulder, the tears started flowing. She said very little. I really didn’t want to speak but her presence meant the world to me. To this day I still hold a deep sense of appreciation for her silent presence.
As I left the chapel, I felt compelled to go sit alone on the retreat grounds. I had my journal with me because I was using it to take notes at the retreat. Journaling at this point in my life was very sporadic.
As I sat in the chapel I had an idea, I felt like God was calling me to “journal His voice.” I was so self conscious: could I really expect God to speak to me through my own writing? Despite feeling very foolish, I asked God to speak to my heart. I opened my journal and decided to write whatever came to mind. I had done stream of consciousness journaling in high school but never with a prayer asking to hear the Father’s voice.
Here’s what I heard, “Tom I love you. I’ve always loved you. Not because of what you do or because of what you’ve done; I simply love you. You are going to face some hard times. Know that I am with you.” Simple; yes. Profound; not really. Deeply personal and healing. For sure. I then spent the next thirty minutes writing out a conversation with God. I would write my thoughts and then journal what I supposed would be His voice. Those thirty minutes were good, I got my feelings on paper, but those first couple of sentences were different: they felt like the voice of God.
Since that night, I’ve used journaling as a way to listen for God’s voice. Writing helps me to slow down and to hear God’s words more distinctly. At times, I’ll hear God speak as I ask Him questions about a certain scripture passage. At other times, I’ll hear his voice in my questions and His answers. Often I sit quietly and wait. When I sense the voice of God moving, I simply write what I hear.
When I slow down and listen, God speaks.
© 2023, Tom Stephen
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